Overeating is something most of us know all too well. You finally sit down on the lounge after rushing around all day. You turn on your favourite series (something light you've watched many times before) with a bag of chips and snack away. "Just a few," you tell yourself "It's been a busy day, I deserve this." Your hand dips in the bag on repeat as you watch, finally having a chance to rest after an impossibly long day. The kids are in bed and now you can finally relax. Before you know it though, your hand hits the bottom of the bag and you are tipping it upside down to get the last few salty crumbs out. Where did the chips go? The bag must have been half empty before you started. But no, you did it again. Your stomach aches, and you feel guilty and ashamed for letting another "snaccident" happen. Why does this keep happening? You resolve tomorrow to stop this! No more chips. The diet starts tomorrow! A week later though, it happens again. Why can't you stop this cycle?
I have been there, though my vice wasn't chips but chocolate. I would often eat an entire block of chocolate to the point it made me sick and I would feel ashamed and embarrassed. My overeating began when I was only a teenager and continued for many years. Of course, I tried all the usual tactics: don't keep chocolate in the house, all kinds of diets, guilting myself, getting stronger "willpower", exercising to "work it off" but none of these worked. In fact, these strategies likely made my overeating worse. I am sharing this story with you because you need to know you are not alone! Overeating is extremely common, particularly with mums but it does not have to be this way! You can heal your relationship with food and conquer overeating once and for all! This answer though, is not more willpower or more dieting, but to look at the true causes of overeating and developing healthy coping strategies instead of turning to food.
As busy mums, managing the household, work, and children's needs often leaves little time for self-care, including mindful eating habits and healthy stress management tools. Overeating becomes a habit for many mums as they do their best to manage the often-hectic lifestyle that comes along with motherhood. In this article we will address the causes of overeating, how to respond to it gracefully, and strategies to prevent it in the future, all while focusing on the unique challenges that we face as mothers.
What Causes Overeating?
Before we dive into the causes of overeating, I want to define what I mean by overeating. For the purposes of this article, we will define overeating as eating past the point of fullness. This is not related to eating more than a preset calorie goal but rather eating beyond what feels physically comfortable to our bodies.
If we want to address the issues of overeating, we need to discuss what causes us to overeat. When we fail to understand what causes overeating and try to take action steps, we are just putting a bandaid on an infected wound. By addressing the root cause of overeating, we are able to treat the issue appropriately and heal from our overeating. Some of the most common triggers have been listed below.
Emotional Triggers for Overeating in Busy Mums Many of us turn to food to cope with the daily stresses of parenting, work, and household responsibilities. Managing emotions can be complicated as a parent and often we have not been taught healthy emotional outlets so we turn to food for comfort and stress management. Unfortunately, the foods we turn to are often those highly processed foods with a low nutritional density. These foods are designed to be highly desirable and it is extremely difficult for us to manage the amount we eat. This often leads to overeating and the associated health risks.
Environmental Cues that Lead to Overeating The environment we create at home can significantly influence our eating habits. Often due to the nature of a busy life, we find ourselves eating on the go, finishing kids' meals, or consuming larger portions due to lack of time to prepare balanced meals. Our tendency to ignore our hunger cues in the busyness of life results in overeating, particularly at night when we are tired and less mindful of our eating habits. Distractions like multitasking during meals can also lead to mindless eating.
Dietary Restrictions and Overeating Strict dieting or trying to follow rigid food rules can backfire, leading to intense cravings and overeating. Many of us, especially those of us who are influenced by bounceback culture (check out my article on bounceback culture) and struggle with accepting our changed bodies, find ourselves caught in the dieting cycle. Our bodies are designed for survival and resist being run on a calorie deficit (this doesn't mean it can't be done, but we must be careful how we do this). When we create strict rules about how much and what we eat, we increase the chances of overeating, especially at night when we are tired and our willpower is naturally lower. By taking a more gentle approach to healthy eating and even weight loss, we can help prevent overeating.
Physiological Factors Influencing Overeating We often find ourselves skipping meals and eating in a rush due to our busy schedules. This can lead to extreme hunger, causing overeating when we finally have the chance to eat. As mentioned in my article on Mindful Eating, slowing down and focusing on our meals helps us to reduce not only how much we eat but also what we eat. When we are constantly in a rush, we often grab a highly processed snack or scarf down our kid's table scraps while standing in the kitchen over a sink of dirty dishes which can easily lead to eating more than intended or eating significantly more calories than we are aware of. Hormonal imbalances, sleep deprivation, and exhaustion also play a role in making it difficult to regulate hunger and fullness signals. Put simply, between stress, lack of time and exhaustion, managing to overeat as a busy parent takes a lot of intentionality and planning.
How to Respond to Overeating Incidents
Now that we understand the causes of overeating, we must discuss how we can respond to these overeating incidents. Often as women (and parents) we become frustrated and blame ourselves, saying "If only I had more willpower" or "What is wrong with me? Why can't I stop eating?" but these judgemental thoughts often make overeating worse. It is critical that we respond to these events with grace and compassion. A journal here can be helpful. When you notice you have had an incident of overeating, write it down and note down the circumstances like where this happened, what time of day, your energy levels and your emotional situation. Hunger and emotional processing are strong triggers that contribute to overeating. As you make a habit of this journalling, look for patterns that may show your triggers or challenges with overeating.
Practice Self-Compassion After Overeating the first step is to practice self-compassion. Avoid self-criticism and guilt, which can perpetuate a negative cycle. Recognize that overeating is a common experience, especially for busy mums juggling many responsibilities. Treat yourself with kindness and understanding. This can be done by simply taking a step back, putting away any food, taking a big breath and saying something like. "I overate today and that is okay. I am not weak or a failure." Allowing ourselves to fall into shame and guilt often causes overeating to become worse. Focus on grace and forgiveness.
Reflect on Overeating Triggers Reflect on what may have triggered the overeating incident. Was it stress from work, a chaotic family meal, or a moment of emotional distress? Understanding the cause can help you address the root issue and develop healthier coping strategies. Managing our emotions is so important as parents but many of us do not possess those essential coping strategies which often results in us turning to food in those moments of emotional distress. Take some time to reflect on strategies to help manage your emotions like journalling, going for a walk, calling a friend, hugging a pet or your kids or screaming into a pillow
Resume Normal Eating Patterns After overeating, it's crucial to return to normal eating patterns rather than skipping meals or restricting food. Because of the often associated guilt and shame, many of us will attempt to overcompensate for overeating with excessive exercise or further restriction. This strategy, unfortunately, further feeds this binge-and-restrict cycle causing overeating to become worse in the long term. Focus on balanced, nutritious meals and listen to your body's hunger and fullness cues. This approach helps prevent further cycles of overeating.
Reframe Your Mindset Around Food Shift your mindset from an all-or-nothing approach to one of balance and moderation. Often we complain that we have no self-control around food because of how we view these foods. Simply changing the time of day you allow yourself certain foods may help to reduce cases of overeating. For example, if you only allow yourself ice cream after the kids have gone to bed, try having a single scoop of ice cream with lunch. This can help you to be more mindful and take the time to enjoy your dessert when you are not as tired and stressed as you are by the end of the day. This helps promote a mindful approach to eating and ice cream becomes less of an emotional crutch. Allow yourself to enjoy a variety of foods without labelling them as "good" or "bad." This perspective reduces feelings of deprivation and the likelihood of overeating.
How to Prevent Overeating
Mindful Eating Practices for Busy Mums Incorporate mindful eating practices to foster greater awareness of your body's signals. Take time to savour your food, even if it means setting aside a few quiet moments during a busy day. Eat slowly and eliminate distractions when possible, helping you recognize when you're comfortably full. Want to know more about Mindful Eating, check out my article here https://jennytheissignutri.wixsite.com/jenny-theissig-nutri/post/mindful-eating-for-busy-moms-practical-tips-for-a-healthier-lifestyle
Establish Regular Meal Patterns Create a routine of regular meal patterns to help regulate hunger. Regulating hunger has a positive impact on overeating. If you struggle with understanding hunger- and fullness cues, check out my article here on Hunger- and Fullness Cues https://jennytheissignutri.wixsite.com/jenny-theissig-nutri/post/understanding-hunger-and-fullness-cues-a-guide-for-busy-mums
Aim to eat balanced meals and snacks at consistent times throughout the day. Include a mix of protein, healthy fats, and complex carbohydrates as well as foods you love to keep you satisfied and reduce cravings. A single scoop of ice cream with some nuts, a sprinkle of toasted muesli and fresh berries makes a delicious and nutritious snack that is both emotionally and physically satisfying
Address Emotional Triggers for Overeating Find alternative ways to cope with emotional triggers. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation, such as exercise, hobbies, spending time with friends, going for a walk, taking a bath or doing something else for a few minutes. Consider talking to a therapist or counsellor if emotional eating is a significant challenge.
Create a Supportive Eating Environment Set up your home to support healthy eating habits. Keep nutritious snacks available and limit high-calorie, low-nutrient options. Plan meals ahead of time to avoid last-minute unhealthy choices, and involve your kids in meal preparation to make it a family activity.
Set Realistic Eating Goals Set realistic and attainable goals for your eating habits. Focus on making small, gradual changes rather than drastic overhauls. Celebrate your successes and be patient with yourself as you work towards developing a healthier relationship with food.
The following video gives some practical tools to help you address overeating. We need to address overeating not just from a nutritional standpoint but also from a psychological view.
Conclusion
Overeating is a very common experience for many mums but it does not need to be a lifetime struggle. Understanding the causes that lay beneath overeating is critical to know how to resolve these and find a healthier balance towards food. Overeating is often impacted by emotional stress, environmental cues, and physiological factors. By responding to overeating with grace and understanding instead of criticism and shame, we can learn from these experiences and develop strategies to prevent them. Self-compassion, mindful eating, and addressing emotional triggers are essential will help to heal and move on from overeating long term. Remember, it’s about progress, not perfection, and creating a sustainable, positive relationship with food that supports your busy lifestyle. Food only has as much power as we give to it.
If you are struggling to break the hold that overeating has over you, send me an email and book your free 30-minute introductory call now.
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