Intuitive Eating For Mums: How You And Your Family Benifit

Life with young kids can often be hectic, constantly rushing from one thing to the next running on minimal sleep, and in this chaos, we often neglect our own physical and mental health but how can we change this? Time and energy are finite resources and with little ones (or perhaps not-so-little ones) demanding much of these resources, how do we take care of ourselves? And why is it important to do so?

The one thing I have discovered in the few years I have been a parent is that finding this balance between caring for my children and caring for myself is vital and yet it often seems impossible. I am responsible for caring for my children but when I neglect my own health and wellbeing that has a strong impact on my children and their wellbeing. If I am not getting enough rest and not nourishing my body well, I am tired, irritable, and much more likely to snap at my kids. At the moment where I make sure my kids have what they need and push myself to the back of the line with the thought “I’ll eat later”, I am prioritizing my child’s health over my own. This is not a bad thing. When we have children, we take on the role of being responsible for caring for them, but we must also acknowledge how neglecting our needs affects our children. If you are always running on empty, you cannot give your best to your children.

Whether we see it or not, our choices to nourish our bodies affect our children. This can be a positive or negative thing. When my oldest, my daughter, was about two years old I, like many new mums, embarked on a mission to lose the baby weight and get back to the size that I had been pre-pregnancy. I went on a lower carb (a loose version of keto) reducing my carb intake drastically and at first, I was very excited to see the number on the scale drop reasonably quickly. After only a few months, I was successful! I saw a number on the scale that I had not seen since I was in high school. But at what cost?

Every morning I stepped on the scale and if the number on the scale were unacceptable, I would restrict my carb intake for the next couple of days to get it back to what I thought it should be. In short, I allowed the scale to dictate my behavior. I wasted hours of my time and mental energy reading nutritional labels, logging meals in an app, and trying to find lower-carb alternatives to my favorite meals. I continued this way until I fell pregnant with my around twelve months later. I knew that dieting during pregnancy was difficult and even dangerous, so I stopped restrictive eating. But that did not mean that the worries of weight gain and getting my pre-pregnancy body back afterward went away. It felt like all that work had been for nothing and I would have to go through it all again in a few months (or years).

In November 2020 my son arrived happy and healthy, and the next few months were spent settling into the new phase of life, with two little children at home and all that was going on in the world at the time. One day I stumbled over a video on YouTube from a dietitian talking about something called intuitive eating. I had never heard of this before but I was intrigued. I mean, eating whatever I want without restriction sounded great. But is this healthy? And is this a sustainable approach for mums?

In the rush of everyday mum life, we often find ourselves being so focused on our kids that our own health and nutrition tend to take a back seat. Yet, as mums, nourishing ourselves is crucial not only for our own well-being but also for setting a positive example for our children. This is where intuitive eating comes in - a mindful approach to food that encourages us to tune into our body's hunger and fullness cues, encouraging and focusing on developing a healthy relationship with food and our bodies. In this article, we'll talk about what intuitive eating is, how it can benefit mums and their families, and some practical strategies for putting it into practice in our everyday lives

What is Intuitive Eating?

Intuitive Eating is a “self-care eating framework” developed by two dietitians in the mid-1990s that emphasizes listening to our body's signals to guide our eating decisions. Rather than following strict diets or meal plans, intuitive eaters focus on listening to internal cues of hunger, fullness, and satisfaction to determine when, what, and how much to eat. It promotes body acceptance and diversity and focuses on health rather than weight loss. This approach promotes a balanced diet without the need for restrictive rules or feelings of guilt around food choices. Intuitive eating acknowledges the impact of diet culture on our diets and the negative impact this has on our health.

Below I have linked a short YouTube video from my colleague Meghan Livingstone that gives a good overview of intuitive eating

Key Benefits for Moms and Families

Most of us were raised in the height of toxic diet culture and opening our eyes to the impact that this has had on our relationship with food is essential. When we accept that “nothing tastes as good as skinny feels” is destructive to both our physical and mental health, we open ourselves up to something new; intuitive eating.  Intuitive eating offers a balanced approach to nutrition, exercise, and self-care. By reconnecting with our body's God-given wisdom, we can better meet our nutritional needs while also nurturing our emotional and mental well-being. Intuitive Eating acknowledges the role our thoughts and environmentplay int our decision-making when it comes to food. For many of us, this may sound wonderful but can Intuitive Eating benefit mums and their families? Or is it just something we say that makes us feel good? Here are just a few ways in which intuitive Eating can benefit mums and their families

1. Balanced Nutrition: Diet culture categorizes food into good/bad in the hopes that we will eat more nutrient-dense foods and less of the highly processed ones. This kind of thinking though often results in the opposite causing us often to crave the“bad” as these are often the most palatable foods. The resulting feelings of guilt and shame often drive us to eat more highly processed foods, further fueling the diet cycle and resulting in a negative impact on our body image and self-esteem. Intuitive eating encourages a diverse and balanced diet, incorporating all food and focusing on the pleasure of the eating experience. It acknowledges the issues with diet culture and black-and-white thinking when it comes to preferences for our nutrition and centers around honoring our body's cravings and preferences. By doing this,  we are more likely to consume a variety of nutrient-rich foods that support our overall health and energy levels.

2. Positive Body Image: The classic diet mentality says “If you are overweight, it’s your fault.”Though many people know that weight is not entirely dictated by their habits, they struggle to accept their body the way it was created to be. Many studies have shown the impact that genetics have on weight, but we still blame ourselves for our perceived weight issues. Rejecting the diet mentality and embracing intuitive eating can lead to improved body acceptance and improved self-esteem as we learn to accept and love the bodies that God has given us and focus on building healthy habits. As moms, cultivating a healthy body image is essential for modeling confidence and self-love to our children as well as accepting our changing bodies pre- and post-childbirth as well through each season of life. IntuitiveEating also supports building body confidence in our children as they grow and change and shows them that their appearance does not define them.

3. Role Modeling: Children learn by example, and by practicing intuitive eating ourselves, we can still have healthy eating habits in our kids from a young age. Please take a moment to think about how your mother spoke about her body or food when you were a child. Did she speak positively? Or was she negative and critical? Our children are little sponges, picking up quickly on what we say about ourselves and our food. Do you want your child repeating the words you speak over yourself? Understanding the influence, we have over our children means we carry a heavy responsibility to raise children who are confident in their bodies and their food choices. By demonstrating how to listen to our bodies and respect our hunger and fullness cues, we empower our children to develop a healthy relationship and hunger with food and their bodies. We help them let go of the negative that easily takes hold of their minds and show them that food is something to be enjoyed and there is space on the table for all kinds of food, not just broccoli and carrots but donuts and ice cream as well.

4. Emotional Well-being: Intuitive eating encourages a non-judgmental approach to food and eating, helping mums break free from the cycle of guilt and shame often associated with dieting. As mothers, we have a strong influence over our children’s relationship with their bodies and with food. By focusing on nourishment rather than restriction, we can build a positive relationship with food, our bodies, and even with our children. We reduce stress around mealtime and focus on making food enjoyable, not just physically but also emotionally. Creating a positive meal-time environment also focuses on making that time to connect with our children and make positive memories. A positive atmosphere also has a positive impact on our children on both our own eating habits as well as our children's.

All of this may sound lovely but how do I go about implementing intuitive eating at home? The following tips will help break this down for you.  

Practical Strategies for Incorporating Intuitive Eating

Now that we understand the benefits of intuitive eating, let's discuss some practical strategies for incorporating this approach to eating into our daily lives as busy moms:

1.    Create a Nurturing Mealtime Environment:

Set the stage for mindful eating by creating a calm and inviting atmosphere at mealtimes. Turn off distractions like phones and televisions, and clear away clutter from the table. Encourage family members to savor their food and engage in meaningful conversation. Use the time to connect with your family, asking them about school, work, or other activities of the day. This helps to build positive relationships with the family and eases the pressure on eating. Avoid heated debates and disagreements during mealtime as this can be counterproductive to building a nurturing mealtime environment. Dinner time can often become a chaotic place so we want to bring back some of the joy and peace to the dinner table that our children desperately need.

2.    Listen to Your Hunger Cues:

It sounds simple: honor your hunger and fullness. But it is often harder than we expect it to be. Tuning into your body's hunger signals and honoring them by eating when you're physically hungry can take some practice but keeping some log can be helpful here, particularly in the early days. Pay attention to the early signals like tiredness, headaches, lack of mental focus, and wandering thoughts, and satisfy your hunger to prevent becoming overly hungry. Waiting to become overly hungry can result in eating at a rapid pace and overeating when food finally becomes available. Respond with nourishing meals and snacks will help to honor your body’s needs with love and compassion.

3.    Practice Mindful Eating:

As mothers, we often find ourselves scarfing down our children’s table scraps over the kitchen sink or rushing through mealtimes to get on with the next task. As a result, we often become unaware of just how much we are eating(or not eating). Slowing down and savoring each bite of our food, allowing ourselves enough time to enjoy our meal, encourages mindful eating and helps us to become more aware of what we are eating. We must take the time to appreciate the flavors, textures, and aromas of our food, and listen to our body's cues of fullness and satisfaction. This results in keeping our energy levels and moods more stable which causes us to become a more present and available parent.

4.    Ditch the Food Rules:

Whether we see it or not, food rules have a heavy influence on the way we treat food. We tell ourselves we are being “bad” by eating the chocolate cake but this doesn’t stop us from eating (it likely actually drives us to eat more!). By letting go of rigid food rules and embracing  flexibility in our eating habits we allow ourselves to enjoy all foods without restriction, without labeling them as "good" or "bad." Remember, there's no such thing as a perfect diet, and variety is key. When we let go of the food rules that govern our food decisions, we open ourselves up to become more compassionate with ourselves. But know that, though the journey towards becoming an intuitive eater won't always be smooth, it is worth the effort.

5.    Cultivate Self-Compassion:

Be kind to yourself and practice self-compassion on your intuitive eating journey. It's normal to have ups and downs during your intuitive eating journey. Sometimes you will overeat, sometimes you will find yourself wandering back into that black-and-white diet culture mentality, and sometimes you will have days where you don’t feel good about your body, and that is okay. Give yourself grace as you navigate the challenges of motherhood, intuitive eating, and body acceptance. Focus on nourishing yourself and your family, embracing this new approach to nutrition and health.

Conclusion

In a culture that often promotes quick fixes and fad diets, intuitive eating offers a more approachable alternative -one rooted in self-care, balance, and mindfulness. As mums, embracing intuitive eating not only benefits our own well-being but also sets a powerful example for our children, teaching them to trust their bodies and honor their unique nutritional needs. It embraces the fact that weight and health are not bound to diet culture and that there are many factors that affect them. It views food as more than just fuel and focuses on bringing back the joy of eating without falling into excess. Let's nourish ourselves from the inside out, embracing the joy and abundance that intuitive eating has to offer and lay a foundation to raise a generation that is not wrapped up in diet culture and the obsession with thinness.

Note: intuitive eating is a journey, not a destination. Be patient with yourself as you learn to reconnect with your body's God-given wisdom and celebrate the small victories along the way. Together, we can cultivate a healthier, happier relationship with food and our bodies, one bite at a time.